Hunger Pangs and Eudaimonia
It's 7PM and I still have no idea about the time that Camus might actually pick us up for dinner. I don't even know if I'm really supposed to be here, though I appreciate the invitation. :) I'm quite hungry, actually, and I wish that this show gets on the road soon... or I might just fall asleep like Carlo and miss eating altogether. That means I'll miss my insulin shots for tonight and wake up with blood sugar levels raised sky high. Geez.
Anyway.
I've been wanting to get in touch with my Philisophy teacher, Mr. Bulaong, for quite some time already. I remember his email address, but I have to admit that I get cold feet at the thought of writing to him--not that I haven't written to a teacher before (Hello Mr. Calasanz!), but it's the subject I want to write about that brings on the sudden shyness.
Whenever I think about my life recently, my thoughts go back to that one oral exam I had with Mr. Bulaong last year. It was the only oral exam I had that I went through wholeheartedly, without being worried that I would say something wrong, because I was talking about myself and my experiences--and for once, I was able to make sense of them using the lessons I learned in class. My first personal, honest orals. It was all about eudaimonia, a state of happiness brought about by continually improving oneself. Or something like that. I was able to relate the lesson to the stability and confidence I had gained all throughout my college years, to the fact that I was at my peak that year, and that I was ready to face life outside Ateneo. I had said that it would be a challenge to keep going on the track of eudaimonia outside the walls of what had served as my haven for four whole years, but that I was willing to take that challenge more than ever. My grade? An A. Plus the respect of a teacher who had once given me a D for totally lousy orals during Junior year. :p He was so glad that I had changed over the past year, that he offered to help me get into ABS-CBN when I graduated. Priceless.
He never forgot about it, I think. Marcelle mentioned to me once that Mr. Bulaong was wondering about how I am.
Well, Mr. Bulaong, I'm not doing as well as I thought I would during that afternoon outside the Philo Department... I'd like to tell you about it sometime, but I want you to know that I'm still on my feet. I haven't let go of that will to keep at eudaimonia, despite the major setbacks in my life. I'm learning that there's more that one path to follow, and it wouldn't hurt to explore each one... Hopefully, I'll get to keep a smile on my face for longer than a few moments soon, and then I'll get the nerve to visit you and tell you all about it...
I really need to eat and get out of this funk...
posted by Mich @ 10:00 AM
2 Comments:
We all achieve our flourishing in our own different ways. I'm sure yours is just around the corner. :)
hello, mich. this is not marcelle; i'm only using his account to post this comment.
at the risk of sounding sadistic, i will say that i am glad to read about your blog entry. it is because you are continuing to struggle with the insight, that is why i agree with mistervader: then perhaps happiness is just around the corner. what scares me is when people abandon the pursuit of happiness (or are misguided in some way) and instead seek shallow physical or emotional pleasure. the two are different, as you already know. keep it up, mich.
as you said, you already know my email. keep in touch when you wish to.
jon
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